Well OK. I’m taking a deep breath and jumping about putting this out there. I don’t usually like to talk about this sort of thing, but I may—just may—need all the support I can get. On the other hand, this may (I hope will!) be a tempest in a teapot. But just in case it isn't.
I’m having an ultrasound mammogram on Tuesday. Yes, there’s a lump. It feels huge to me—somewhere between an almond and a walnut. My doctor seemed a bit alarmed (I have a family history of breast cancer), but not overly so. She scheduled me for the procedure “ASAP” which is a step above "urgent" but not "emergency." She also warned me that depending on findings, they may want to do a biopsy then and there. I’ve had a biopsy before—it was not pleasant or fun and the fear of the results made it even less so.
So this may be nothing. That’s the attitude I’m trying to cultivate—just a test to make sure everything’s fine, which it is, blah blah blah.
The plus side—if there is one—is that the few non-blog friends I’ve shared this with have been uniformly caring and supportive in their various ways—holding me in prayers, reassuring me, promising me support. And Strong Heart has been simply stellar. Words fail me to describe just how, but she has been. “The sacrament of presence” pretty much covers it.
So friends—if you also would keep me in prayer on Tuesday, I will be very grateful. “For prayer avails much.”
Postscript: In rereading, I have realised how ungracious I sound about my friends. You are on the plus side of this, every one of you. Especially SH, who is going to be there with me on Tuesday.
12 comments:
Praying with you and sending healing for Tuesday!
Jeanine
I caught your comment in the Saturday Party. Prayers from here.
Oh, RP, how scary. I will definitely hold you in prayer on Tuesday and as it approaches.
Came over to say thanks for posting the comment about the inclusive 23rd Psalm--I love that piece and this kind of resource is much needed in our churches. I saw it in the FF comments--not sure if it was intended for the Preacher Party or if it ended up there too. So since I am finishing up a Musical Musings about God's healing love I may flag it in the text there as well....
Take good care of yourself, okay? So glad that you have good support and your dear one by your side.
Prayers of love and deep peace, strength, courage, and wild hope.
Keeping you in my thoughts these next couple of days.
Prayers to you. As a breast cancer survivor, here is my best thought before a test/biopsy: It's nothing until they tell you it's something. Then you take it one day at a time. Peace...
Yup - prayers your way... God is not surprised when we are.
Deb
Praying here too RP.
And here.
Another RevGalPal showing up with prayers for you, Rainbow Pastor! Though I'm horrible at practicing this myself, in reading your post, I was reminded of the Buddhist (and Christian, and all faiths, really....) ideal of non-attachment. It is a challenge indeed to be hopeful but not attached to any particular outcome. But I am praying that you can be present for yourself in each moment, and present not so much to the outcome but to yourself as you move through this. Be well....
Remembering you as Monday slips into Tuesday and your challenging biopsy. Praying that God will give you the strength to take on celebration of the result or planning for other options. We are blessed with strong bodies that can handle it. May your spirit be as strong tomorrow.
I've been through that ultra sound/unpleasant biopsy stuff...and I sympathize. In my case it was a fibroid tumor and nothing to be concerned about. I hope it will be something simple like that for you as well.
Love and thoughts and prayers coming your way, RP.
Praying for you today - peace.
Post a Comment